A letter...

Dear K,

I know you will never see this and more then likely never know the plans that were made for you before you were born.

That you will never know how much you were loved by people you will never know. How I held you and that you looked into my eyes and I knew right then...I would love you forever.

When everything changed at first, when they told us you were not coming home with us that day I wished we never had those days together but now I am so grateful for them. I wouldn't change a thing.

Those days together I got to know you and how you loved your head being stroked so much your eyes would roll back(so adorable) and how you HATED having your diaper put on and you would scream until it was on, but then if you had your soother while changing it you were fine, how you pooped every
time I would change you and even "sprayed" me twice!!! 

I also got to see a side of R I have never seen...A sparkle in his eye, the smile on his face while we sat there beside you, he talked about you and how he was going to play ball hockey in the driveway with you. All the plans he had for you.
He truly loves you!

Its only been two days since I saw you and my arms ache so much to hold you, I have no idea how I will make it through this life without you.

All I can do is pray you will grow up and be happy with your life and wish for you to be strong no matter what...Know you can be whoever/whatever you want to be!
That life is hard at times but also has joy and to always try and remember the joy during the hard times, that is what will help you get through.

The time we had with you was very short but the memories will last a life time.

I love you!